he's gone.
he left us, 6:52 pm on 28 feb 2005

his eyes were dilated that morning 5:30 am,
his responses stopped
he slipped into coma.

at 5:30 am
i sat by his side,
used the once-used moisturizer
massaged his dry skin,
held his fingers
while tears kept rolling down
they kept flowing down
like
endless rain.

5 days before,
i saw the edges of his lips curve
as I showed him our family photos
him, my sis, his sons,
my mum, me and my sisters and other bro-in-laws
i saw his nod of acknowledgement
and the smile
that moved my heart.

i fed him water,
i touched his loving hands
i taught him to move his reflexes
i patted his chest
i touched his legs
i tickled his toes
i kissed his hands and forehead
i wiped away his tears
i massaged his shoulders

before he was in a coma
he suddenly responded to us even tho one of his eyes couldnt open
as compared to before,
where he couldnt hear or understand us,
this time
from 26-27 feb,
i told him he was gonna get well
we were gonna bring him home
he nodded
=)

i told him he was the best brother and father in the world
i wanted him to be well and see me graduate in 2 yrs time
see me get married and be my wedding witness
since he had seen me grown up since i was 4
i thanked him for being the best in the world
and i want him to be reincarnated in our family again

we loved him like our blood brother

he will be my only kor kor
the best one i have ever had.

goodbye kor kor,
u were the best
and i will always love and miss you.

thank you for loving us
like we were ur real blood family
thank you for teaching us to live and love as a family
we will never ever forget you.

we collected ur bones,
they were reddish and broken
too much medication
kor kor, u were in pain
u no longer are suffering
we will all pray for you
we will all miss you.

i love you.